April 6, 2023
Alana Grier - Mindful Moments For Self Care
Are you a female entrepreneur who gets caught in negative thinking? Or are you someone whose brain makes a mountain out of a molehill?
On this episode of the Wellness and Wealth podcast, Alana Grier addresses mindful moments for self-care so that you can stay out of what she calls “stinkin’ thinking.” She also shares her experience working in the recovery community and learning how sometimes thinking about more than the moment we’re in can lead to judgment and stress on the body.
In this episode, Alana Grieri answers the following questions:
- What does mindful questioning mean?
- What is a one-minute check-in, and why was it developed?
- What signs a 5-minute breath-centering practice could be helpful when it comes to female entrepreneurship?
- Finally, what is the fastest way to have an attitude adjustment?
Offer 1: 12 week mindfulness program, please check out my school website https://peaceful-mindful-yoga-school.teachable.com/p/peace-of-mindfulness
Offer 2: One-on-One session here: https://calendly.com/peacefulmindfulyoga/peace-of-mindfulness-q-a
Connect with Wendy Manganaro:
Connect with Wendy Manganaro:
Transcript
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Hi everyone.
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My name's Wendy Manganaro and I am the Host of the Wellness and Wealth podcast.
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I'm so happy to have you find us.
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And if you could take a moment and hit that subscribe button, I'd really appreciate it.
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This is the podcast where we believe when you show up better for yourself as a woman business owner, you show up better for your business.
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So sit back, relax.
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And learn from the practical to the woo-hoo, how to best take care of you.
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Have a great day.
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Stay blessed.
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And leave a review when you're done listening to the show, thanks so much.
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Hi everyone.
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Welcome back.
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Today we're talking about mindful moments for self-care, and I have Alana Grier and Alana is a yoga and mindfulness teacher, integrative health coach, and licensed massage therapist in New Mexico.
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She began her studies in eastern medicine and meditation in 1987 at the New England Shiatsu Center in Boston, Massachusetts and now have more than 30 years of education experience in health and wellness.
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Using sound and music to bring healing and balance is central to her practice as a yogi.
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Musician and sound healer.
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Alana is the school director for the Peaceful Mind Yoga School, formerly 365 Poly Yoga Instructor School, and the lead trainer for the 200 hour Devani yoga teaching training.
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This well-rounded teacher training provides interested students of yoga supportive space to individualize their practice and deepen their understanding for yoga.
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Alana supports her clients with yoga, coaching, mindfulness and hypnotherapy in her office in Tayo and online through Zoom.
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Welcome Milana.
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Thank you.
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It's so great to be here, Wendy.
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Thank you.
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And I'm looking forward to this show because we're gonna talk about those small moments of self-care, because a lot of people think that self-care, it has to be this elongated.
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Sit for 60 hours to meditate type of thing sometimes.
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And so this is good to talk about like how we fit self-care into those moments during the day.
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Of course, my first question is what does mindful questioning mean to.
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So mindfulness is being in the moment with acceptance and that key thing of being an acceptance, or we could think of it as neutrality rather than having any kind of a charge to it can be a real challenge in challenging times.
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So mindful questioning is really checking in with your thinking, but in a mindful way.
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I call it a thought audit.
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If we're auditing our thoughts, we're really just checking in and going, what am I thinking about right now?
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And there's been different studies over the last few decades about how many thoughts we have a day.
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It's now currently everybody's agreed upon more like 6,000 thoughts a day or six and a half thoughts a minute.
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And, there's other statistics going around.
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I really don't know how they get this, but I did read how they got the six and a half thoughts per minute.
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I understand that, but another statistic going around is 80% plus of our thoughts are repetitive and not remotely helpful.
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And that does actually sound pretty true from my perspective.
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So mindful questioning is looking at your thoughts, but with a mindfulness approach.
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So that's letting go of judgments and that can be challenging, right?
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Having patience, having a beginner's mind, I think of it like you're an investigator who's trying to get to the bottom of it, and, you have a neutrality with it.
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So you're investigating your thoughts, you're auditing your thoughts, you're noticing what you're thinking about, you're noticing how often do you feel in control of your thinking?
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And when you're able to just kind of stop, quiet, your thoughts, meditate, how well does your mind cooperate with you?
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And that's gonna fluctuate of course, depending on what's going on with you.
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But how often is your thinking out of control?
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How often is your thinking really leading to what I would call stinking thinking?
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There's a quote from Mark Twain that says, I've been through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
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And that is really the sum of our reality, our minds and our stinking thinking and our worrying about, what could possibly be is not actually very helpful and it's not often very true.
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So when it comes to your thought audit, there's just two questions I recommend you start with, and that is when you notice your thoughts, you notice the color of them.
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Are they neutral?
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Are they negative?
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Are they positive?
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And then you ask yourself, is this true?
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And is this helpful?
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Because a lot of times we come to the conclusion that we can't possibly know if it's true.
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I don't know that I'm gonna, lose my job tomorrow or not be able to pay the rent next month, or I don't know that this person doesn't like me.
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They could just be having a bad day.
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I'm not a mind reader.
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So a lot of our thoughts are not necessarily true and they're not necessarily helpful.
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So the more we kind of just stop with interest, curiosity, beginner's mind, no judgment, and just go, okay, what's going on with my thinking today?
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Am I in control of it at all?
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Can I stop it?
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Can I quiet?
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And if not, I'm gonna start to what I call weeding out those thoughts that aren't helpful and it is very much like weeding they will grow back.
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But like weeding, once you've done your diligence and once you've done quite a bit of work of weeding out those thoughts that are not helpful and not true.
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They grow back a lot slower and it's a lot easier for you when those weeds pop back up.
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You're like, oh, that's easy.
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One weed.
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Got it.
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Rather than a whole field getting ready to plant your garden.
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And then of course, that leaves room for the thoughts that are helpful and are true.
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And that would be, coming into gratitude and stopping into the moment and honoring what's really happening.
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That's incredible.
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I have a follow up question cuz you said key things in the beginning, especially in all of it, but, this idea of acceptance and neutrality.
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I think a lot of people struggle, especially in an ever-changing world, cuz everything changes constantly for us and so it's this, okay, I accept this, and then something else changes.
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I accept this, and then something else changes.
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And I think that there's something about this neutrality.
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Do you do in your experience as you're talking about all of this, is that the hardest thing for us to do as people do you think is that acceptance?
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And when we start looking at this, when, especially when we're talking about all of those thoughts all at once, which is a lot by the way, and I concur probably most of them not useful.
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This idea of things that really aren't happening and true.
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Do you think it's base fear that we're dealing with?
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I always feel like I'm like, okay.
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Especially your example of I'm not gonna be able to pay the rent next month.
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That's not really what the fear is behind it.
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It's usually I'm gonna be homeless, but we don't think that at first we think, I'm not gonna be able to pay the rent.
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I'm gonna lose my job.
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And then we just start down this trail.
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We start down that stinking thinking rabbit hole that, Mark Twain says, I've worried about a lot of things.
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A few of which have happened.
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And how many gray hairs do I have from worrying about things that were not really even remotely, something I needed to worry about if I had, come back to that place of for one, it's a lot of falling into what's within my control, what can I do about it?
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And those two questions really help you to arrive there.
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Is it helpful?
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Is it true?
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Is two very good places to start and then you know, next is there anything I can do about it?
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So if there's something I can do about it and I can shift to feeling empowered, then great.
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If there's nothing I can do about it, I have to come to a place of trust.
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I have to really do my work to calm my own nervous system down.
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Because we are surrounded by triggers and they're getting worse and worse and worse.
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The world feels like spinning faster.
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And the information age has just taken over and AI.
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Amazon's telling us what we need to order before we know we're out of it.
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This world is feeling a lot faster and I'm personally noticing how much I'm having to deal with technology and there's this resonance factor, of technology, all of this stuff around me in my house, and there's just so much refrigerators and things that are buzzing at this 60 Hertz and that resonance that's at the top of our thinking.
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That's at a very hyper arousal state for our mind.
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Our mind actually works, from kind of four hertz to 60 hertz they say, and I'm sure that they'll discover more.
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But, we can't always be at this accomplishing doing.
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Place with our nervous system.
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Our nervous system.
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Our mind is designed to go all the way down to this four hertz deep sleep state, and then this trance-like state.
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And then the alpha range is when we're in this meditative, enjoyable state.
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That's for everybody.
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It's really just how fast is your brain waves going and when they're at eight to 13 hertz, you're in a beautiful sublime state.
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You're present, you're here, you're alert, and yet you're fully relaxed.
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And that's the alpha zone.
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So the problem is it's hard for us to get into alpha.
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Because of this resonance factor of, I think the electric grid and the EMFs and all of this is very much affecting us and our nervous system, but also just the stressors of how am I gonna pay my bills and oh my gosh, I have these deadlines and social stressors of having to deal with difficult people at work or in the family.
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There are just so many stressors, What I've done with mindfulness over the last, 15 years of my life since I really delve deep and discovered it, because I am a single mom.
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My kids are all adults now, but there was a period of 18 years where I was raising my five children without any child support or any support of any kind.
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And all I had was seconds.
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So these mindful moments is taking a moment to reset my nervous system to notice that I'm getting stressed, to notice those indicators that I'm getting stressed, and then to do what I can to counter that and come out of that and not let myself be triggered left and right.
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So, Insulating yourself from those stressful people, insulating yourself from the news for a period of time that you need, a respite from the world, that kind of thing
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it's so interesting you were talking about the stressors and info, especially info technology age that we live in, and it's very interesting.
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Me and I started to say this probably.
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In the start of my marketing career is, especially when I used to do free courses for parents.
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The internet and safety and all of that.
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And I was like, the fact of the matter is all of the information's always been there.
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How we used to get it was so slowed down.
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When you think about it, we had people riding on horses to give the news at one point in time.
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And then we went to newspapers where people had it right in front of them and they, but they still had it in a 24 hour lag.
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And then we were watching the five 30 news at night.
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There was times for it.
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And it had a beginning and an end.
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And now we're living in a time, there's no end to it.
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Unless we shut it off.
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And it takes the responsibility of us to be like, okay, how much of this do I really want in my world?
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So it's our responsibility to shut it off, but it's not that it's not there.
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And I think that has done something to us to make us feel like we always have to be on.
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Yep.
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Yeah, do, do, do.
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Accomplish, accomplish, accomplish.
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It's, but the rest and the rest is absolutely critical.
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Yeah.
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I always teach that too, is, and I've done some other things like, being responsible for your own social media, and that's part of it is you are responsible for going on, shutting it off, seeing what's in your newsfeed, hiding what you don't wanna see, because.
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It.
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Nobody's forcing that on you.
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And then, so it's all of these things that you learned how to take this respite so that you can be healthier.
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I am curious as you're starting to talk about your story a little bit is, you're talking about these one minute check-ins.
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I have a feeling it's to put the questions you were asking, but what exactly is that and how did you start doing them?
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Well, I've been teaching yoga for 30 years now.
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Thankfully, I discovered at a very young age.
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And, I was teaching in a Montessori school, so, a teacher's aide, and just started with the kids then, and I took off and I've always taught yoga.
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I'm grateful for that.
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But I fell into mindfulness about 15 years ago when I was working at the University of New Mexico.
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And teaching an evidence-based stress management program that opened up the door to mindfulness-based stress reduction, developed by John Capen and his colleagues at UMass.
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And so I stuck to that evidence-based system for about little over seven years and worked within that system, which is very profound and very valuable.
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But about seven years ago, I fell into the addiction recovery niche because one of my kids, one of my five children, was struggling with addiction at the time and I was raised by a father who's an alcoholic, and I'd always wanted to get involved with Al-Anon, and explore that kind of support a little bit more.
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But when my son fell into it, that's when I was like, okay, this is what time it is.
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I have to address this and in that I just found myself on this path of offering mindfulness to addiction recovery.
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There was every possible scenario.
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I was in a, 30 day rehab doing a weekly group with them.
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They were paying somewhere upwards of$30,000 for their 30 days of rehab.
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And they were getting mindfulness groups as part of that.
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And that was, one group that I worked with.
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I was also working with people who were caught in the system and had gotten in trouble, who'd gotten in a D W I and had to do my mindfulness class as part of it.
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And a few other nonprofits, and then also high school.
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So with that niche, there wasn't a lot of patience.
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There wasn't the amount of patience I saw in my groups that were doing the mindfulness-based stress reduction, and I knew I had to meet them where they were.
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And so I started to just do quicker things with them One minute, type of things that all they needed to do was commit to, if they remembered to do it, take a minute to do it.
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So the one minute check-in is something I developed and it's first you check in physically.
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And so what that looks like is, closing your eyes or relaxing your gaze so your attention can go inward.
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And almost if you can imagine an M R I from your feet to the crown of your head, you're scanning your attention with that neutrality, with no judgment, with that interest and curiosity beginner's mind exploring, okay, what's happening in my body today?
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How do my feet feel?
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Oh, they're cold.
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Okay.
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How are my shins and calves, or nothing's really going on there.
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How's my sits bones?
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Okay.
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My glutes are really holding, so as you're just going through and noticing, oh, my shoulders are tense.
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Oh, there's pain here whatever's going on, there's no judgment.
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You're just checking in.
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And we take that a little further as we go and we work on things that we can do physically.
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When after doing that quick check-in, we notice that there is a lot of buildup or a lot of tension or a lot of stagnant energy.
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There's one minute things we can do to move it.
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So that's the physical check-in.
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The mental check-in.
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As we pointed out with the first topic, we address is that it's going okay, what am I thinking?
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Is it helpful?
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Is it true?
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How active is my mind right now?
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There's no judgment.
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Your mind is going to fluctuate throughout the day, sometimes you just need to space out and not think about anything, and sometimes it's racing, so you're just checking in how busy.
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What am I working with here and what are the color of my thoughts?
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Are they neutral?
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Are they negative and are they helpful or are they true?
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And there's deeper processes we can go there.
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Then the emotional check-in.
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That's a big aha, because, emotions are so mysterious, especially, it's a cultural thing.
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It's a gender thing.
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Women can't be angry, men can't cry, everybody has like their own relationship with emotions, but emotions are a part of.
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And we in the West often have this attitude of, if we're not living happily ever after, there's something wrong with us and reality check is we are going to be sad, we are going to be mad, we are going to feel ashamed or guilty.
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We are going to feel fear and anxiety.
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There we're going to feel the full gamut of feelings.
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And so just making space for that.
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Even if it's for one minute a day, just checking in and going, what am I feeling?
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Where are those feelings in my body?
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Where do they live?
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What are the sensations that they create?
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Exploring them again with interest and curiosity.
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And then lastly, And each one of these, obviously it can be one minute or longer check-ins in and of themselves, but we get good at just like doing all four of them in a moment.
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And the environment you wanna pay attention to how that affects you.
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How are those fluorescent lights affecting you when you walk into Walmart?
00:18:32.077 --> 00:18:34.417
How is the wind affecting you when you go outside?
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The environment can really stress us out.
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People around us in the environment, noises around us in the environment smells.
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Different things can really affect our nervous system and stress us.
00:18:46.593 --> 00:19:08.222
So this information is telling us a lot if we are willing to do this on even a daily basis for one minute, just checking in, physically, checking in, mentally, checking in with our emotions, checking in environmentally, because it gives us that feedback of how different environments affect us.
00:19:08.593 --> 00:19:12.813
If I do that check-in at Walmart versus by the sitting by the stream.
00:19:13.292 --> 00:19:28.682
When I'm going along for a hike, it's a very different experience and it starts to tell me that if I really need an environmental support with my nervous system, I should go out by the spring and not go to Walmart today.
00:19:28.732 --> 00:19:31.962
Yeah, I'm laughing cuz I have a friend.
00:19:31.962 --> 00:19:33.913
We do like these check-ins too.
00:19:33.923 --> 00:19:39.522
And I'm laughing because it's always amazing how I check in with myself and it's so wonderful when I'm alone.
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When there is nobody, I'm like, I had a great day today.
00:19:42.952 --> 00:19:43.313
Huh?
00:19:43.313 --> 00:19:44.873
I didn't come across that many people.
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There's no problems.
00:19:46.117 --> 00:19:48.663
In other days I'm like, what happened to me today?
00:19:48.712 --> 00:20:02.137
But you're talking about environment, but it does have a difference with the people that you come across in the day of even as simple as, you were talking about the Environment show, uh, reminded me of a show that I'm doing that'll be aired on sustainability.
00:20:02.147 --> 00:20:10.557
Is even going to the store and who's in front of you in line and how are they, if you catch that conversation between them and the cashier of.
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How are they reacting when they're asked?
00:20:12.298 --> 00:20:12.988
How are you?
00:20:12.988 --> 00:20:13.887
Is everything great?
00:20:14.018 --> 00:20:19.238
It's just a very interesting thing that you start to like really catch what's in your environment that way.
00:20:19.238 --> 00:20:25.698
And you're like and how many people say I'm great and then go into a whole line of problems cracks me up every time.
00:20:25.698 --> 00:20:28.248
I'm like, well, that's a curious way of looking at everything's good.
00:20:28.428 --> 00:20:34.867
So for female entrepreneurs specifically, when we're talking about these things, right?
00:20:34.867 --> 00:20:43.667
And we're talking about one minute check-ins and, what being mindful really is, what are the signs they could use some centering.
00:20:43.817 --> 00:20:49.288
What are those things that are, your world is, feels a little upside down and you need something to come back to.
00:20:49.407 --> 00:20:49.738
Yeah.
00:20:50.218 --> 00:20:54.867
So it's what you were just describing about how different people can affect you.
00:20:54.867 --> 00:21:13.333
And, you start to notice that the more you check in, so you know, step one is doing the check-in more and more often, checking in with yourself because you can catch yourself sooner when you're starting to feel stressed and the answer to that is stress, symptoms of stress.
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